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In the past, the prevailing emotions during a divorce were usually sadness and regret. Today, anger is the dominant emotion: People are angry at their spouses, their spouses’ parents, at their spouses’ new partners, etc. All this anger translates into words and deeds that make the divorce process more costly, stressful, frustrating, lengthy, and an all out war. It doesn’t have to be that way, even if you are divorcing the most irrational of humans. Below are the 10 most common mistakes men make in divorce. If you can learn to place your emotions in check and avoid these mistakes, you can alleviate some of the pain that comes with any divorce.

• Using your children as pawns

Threatening to limit or deny visitation is a powerful threat, and it can terrify a parent who loves his child(ren). Often, parents who are the primary caregivers, but who lack the financial resources, feel that they must use this threat to gain sufficient financial support. As painful as these threats are, do not respond in kind. Don’t issue threats of your own. Instead, recognize that in most cases, the truth will come out. If you’ve been a good, responsible parent, your spouse likely cannot deny you a chance to see your kids on a regular basis. More to the point, the court won’t allow it in most instances. 

• Thinking new relationship first, divorce second

The most common factor that turns a normal divorce into an abnormally contentious one is bringing another woman into the mix. The situation is already potentially volatile, and all it takes is the mention that you have a new lover for your spouse to become infuriated. There are several reasons you may want to announce your new relationship-revenge, one being to show her that someone finds you attractive and you’ve even found happiness. Try to keep a new relationship out of the conversations with your spouse and especially your children. The best decision is to wait until the divorce is concluded before you engage in a new relationship.

• Allowing your spouse to convince you to not hire an attorney

If your spouse has hired a lawyer, you need to hire one quickly. If you don’t, you are an amateur playing against professionals. One underhand tactic is for a spouse’s attorney to offer to represent both parties to save time and money. Not only is it unethical, but it also creates a conflict of interest.

The process is designed to be adversarial, and there is no way a lawyer can fairly represent you both. The odds are that your spouse has something to hide or something she wants, and she knows that if you hire a lawyer it will be more difficult to achieve that goal.  

• Using verbal abuse

Just about everyone who gets a divorce argues. Not everyone, however, engages in continuous verbal battles in which threats and vile accusations become routine forms of communication. Being on the receiving end of this abuse is demoralizing, especially when the threats raise the possibility of physical harm to you or your children.

You need to discuss any threats of this type with your attorney, who can advise you on how to deal with them. Furthermore, if it is you who’s engaging in the verbal abuse, remember that your spouse can easily obtain an order of protection and any violation of this order can land you in jail. There is a myth that men do not endure verbal or even physical abuse from their spouses, but it is just a myth. Abuse is not gender specific. 

• If your goal is to avoid a court battle and the high costs that go with it, then you want to avoid any accusations of personality flaws. Be aware of your spouse’s sensitivities and avoid inflaming them. Compromise is the essence of divorce negotiations, and if you say and do things to encourage your spouse to dig in and be inflexible, you’re asking for a war. 

No matter how much you despise your spouse; no matter how many ways you feel you’ve been wronged, don’t make a bad situation worse by identifying your spouse’s vulnerabilities when trying to reach a settlement. Always try to negotiate before you litigate. 

Using a difficult attorney

Lawyers can turn good divorces into bad ones and bad divorces into nightmares. It’s not just divorcing spouses that are difficult. Certain lawyers are intent on churning fees, and they can cleverly manipulate situations to their financial advantage. The result is couples who will fight over the big and little things and invariably wind up in court and broke. Do not fall for the myth that you have to find a take-no-prisoners attorney, someone who is ruthless and will use any tactic necessary to "win" the case. When there is one difficult attorney, the odds are the divorce will be costly and unpleasant. When there are two difficult attorneys, the divorce will be a total nightmare.

Becoming passive

The last thing you want to do when your spouse announces she wants a divorce is to become completely acquiescent. Many people are manipulative, and if they think they can manipulate you into getting what they want out of the divorce, such as money, property or custody, they will do so. If you are stunned or saddened, you may agree to anything and everything your spouse recommends. Don’t confuse passivity with being reasonable. My experience is that the shock of divorce soon wears off, and once it does, you’re much less vulnerable to making this mistake.

In most divorces where couples have been married for a number of years, disputes about property arise, and sometimes these arguments are perfectly understandable. These arguments, however, can become completely irrational and vengeance-based. I had a client say, "I would rather incur 10 times in legal fees what the painting costs than allow her to have it!" These arguments can be draining emotionally (not to mention financially), but it helps to recognize that no matter how your spouse uses these objects in the bargaining process, the court generally divides property fairly if both parties have competent attorneys.

Serving your spouse with divorce papers in embarrassing places

Having an officer of the law serve your spouse at home or business should be reserved for cases where they refuse to file an appearance or accept service of process, or where great conflict exists between the two parties.

There is nothing more embarrassing than having a police officer serve you with papers at work, and nothing more unnerving than hearing the doorbell ring at 2 a.m. and seeing a policeman at the door (and having your neighbors see him as well).

If your spouse uses this tactic on you, as obnoxious as it may be, remain calm.

Responding to an impending divorce with anger

The early stages of the divorce process can be a highly emotional time when people say things they do not mean or act in unusual or uncharacteristic ways. Divorces "blow up" legally when one person responds to anger with even greater anger, creating an escalating war of attrition that otherwise would have been a brief skirmish.

Therefore, allow a bit of time to pass before you do anything. Your spouse may settle down after blowing off some steam, and you can continue to move forward in a reasonable manner.

Source: Askmen.com

One way to stay happy, healthy and fit is to have a good sex life. Sex can cause a person to get fewer colds and research has shown that couples who have sex weekly can have a 30 percent increase in immunoglobulin A which is an antibody that fights infection.

Women can also have a more predictable menstrual cycle as a result to being exposed to male pheromones. In addition to that, sex reduces stress for emotional and physiological reasons. It activates a nerve that gives people a calming effect.

Having sex can lower blood pressure, which reduces the risk of heart disease. It can improve a person’s memory because blood flow increases to the brain. It helps tone the abs, gluts and almost any muscle in your body. This can even reduce LDL, which is bad cholesterol and increase the good cholesterol as well as increase feelings of motivation because of the release of endorphins.

A friend of mine went out on a date with a guy who has been courting her for a few weeks now. When she got back from the date, I asked how it went. She started complaining about a lot of things and told me she didn’t want to go out with him again. Well, here are some of the very common mistakes that both sexes have when going on dates.

For men:

Splashing on excessive amounts of cologne. This is just not that necessary unless you’re trying to disguise the smell of a skunk. Dabbing or spritzing yourself with cologne once or twice would be enough. Your date doesn’t have to smell you a mile away to know you exist.

Wearing globs of hair gel. According to an article in the Internet, the wet look just isn’t in right now. If you’re not confident about how your hair looks, go get a haircut.

Yammering on about ex-girlfriends. One thing my friend complained about during her date. Why in the world would you think WE women would want to hear about your past relationships and your exes? Do you know how annoying that is? When you’re with us and you want to talk about girls, you talk about us and think about us; NOT your exes.

Suggesting they want an open relationship. Umm.. Let me get this straight. You asked us out and now you tell us you want an open relationship? How insulting can you be..

For women:

Getting lazy about love. Sometimes women can be such procrastinators and some can be pretty much laid back. They just sit there in their homes or hang out with their girlfriends somewhere and they expect to find love in an instant. Whatever happened to effort? Try getting to know people of the opposite sex and be more outgoing. Ask friends if they know anyone they can hook you up with. Go to various events and try online dating.

Giving off the wrong dating signals. Women should give off the right signals and use body language to show interest. For example, if you’re at a bar, stand next to the single man you find attractive and smile at him. At the same time, don’t overdo it. Make sure you’re smiling and not staring!

Listening to words before actions.  Pay close attention to how your date acts versus what he says. The language of behavior says it all!

Sticking with cyber-communication. After getting comfortable with someone online, get past the initial stage of dating and lay off the gadgets a bit! Make time to hang out in person to really get to know someone — not just the persona he presents online or on the phone.
 

To every guy that said, "Sex CAN wait"

To every guy that said, "You’re beautiful.

To every guy that was never too busy to drive across town to see he

To every guy that gives her flowers and a card when she is sick or down.

To every guy who has given her flowers just because thats how he rolls.

To every guy that said he would die for her.

To every guy that really would.

To every guy that did what she wanted to do.

To every guy that cried in front of her. ….
To every guy that she cried in front of…
To every guy that holds hands with her.

To every guy that kisses her with meaning.

To every guy that hugs her when she’s sad.

To every guy that hugs her for no reason at all.

To every guy who would give their jacket up for her.

To every guy that calls to make sure she got home safe.

To every guy that would sit and wait for her for hours just to see her for ten minutes…..
To every guy that would give his seat up…
To every guy that just wants to cuddle.

To every guy that reassured her that she was beautiful no matter what.

To every guy who told his secrets to her.

To every guy that tried to show how much he cared through every word and every breath.

To every guy that thought maybe this could be the one.

To every guy that believed in her dreams.

To every guy that would have done anything so she could achieve them.

To every guy that never laughed at her when she told him her dreams.

To every guy that walked her to her car and opened the door.

To every guy that gave his heart

To every guy who prays that she is happy even if you are not with her.

Not many girls appreciate nice guys anymore…
And because of this, there are not many left out there…

10. Pretend to be virtuous
9. Criticize other women
8. Act jealous
7. Become needy - something about security issues.
6. Speak in code - this needs a little explanation. Sometimes men think that women assume they’re mind readers. Women expect them to know what they’re thinking, and I sometimes am guilty of this.
5. Invade personal space.
4. Become too emotional.
3. Shop till they drop.
2. Talk incessantly.
1. Use sex as a weapon.

To know the details on men’s confessions about the 10 annoying things women do, click here.

The average woman is built to come and come again. Oh, how yummy! Meaning that once you’ve mastered that first peak, the climb to the next one is absolutely obtainable. Women don’t require a refractory period like men do, so we’re able to stay aroused for longer and orgasm a second and third time with little effort.

Try maxing out foreplay. Yes, prolong it. Point your man south, to be specific. For most women, clitoral stimulation from oral sex is the easiest way for them to climax. And having your guy help you get there before intercourse means that your body will be geared up to come again and respond to the added vaginal stimulation during sex, rather than still struggling to orgasm for the first time.

And even if you don’t come during foreplay, don’t fast-track the fun stuff: Your guy pampering you down there still paves the way for multiples. If you’re aroused slowly, then you’ll stay aroused for longer, and unlike manual stimulation, his tongue is flexible, soft and strong — the perfect tool for making that happen.

Ask him to caress you down there with his tongue for a minute or so before pulling away for a few seconds. Then, have him dive right back in. Oral teasing techniques prime the body to expect that after each peak of sensation, another one is coming. And it remembers that lesson when you orgasm — after one, it’ll stay in that prepped state for more stimulation, putting you on the track to come again.

Did you know that great sex depends on which positions are right for you and your partner? Yes, it is classified on whether the man is well-endowed, as well as depends on both your energy level, flexibility, and of course, height. There are too many sex positions to mention, so I decided to post two per article along with brief details for each.

First stop, is the energy level. If you’re in the mood for some REAL action, then here’s the position to try. It’s called the Upside Down Position.

Stand facing each other. Girl jumps up and wraps legs around boy’s waist, with the girl’s arms around his neck. Let him penetrate. After doing that, the girl should slowly let go of the guy’s neck so her body would fall backward, ending up in a handstand. The man should be supporting the girl by holding her waist and butt. It not only looks totally hot once you imagine it, but it’s also easier than it looks and sounds.

This position is also called Inversion. The blood in the girl’s body rushes to her head and this produces sensations that would make her reach orgasm. They also say that this position can give the girl’s abs some work out.

Second, is Flexibility. If you’re a flexible couple (especially the girl), then give the Interlock Position a taste.

Begin by having the missionary position, then the guy should sit up and bring both his legs forward one at a time, so the soles of his feet are flat on the bed. His knees are bent and he is facing the girl. He leans back and supports himself on his hands. The girl then sits up and supports herself on her hands, and puts her ankles on his shoulders and lifts her hips as high as she can.

About a decade ago, scientists researched on the cure for vaginal dryness. When they discovered the women’s A-spot, which is a sensitive area located between a woman’s G-sport and cervix, 95 percent of women became massively turned on when this spot was stimulated.